“Men aren’t as interested in spiritual growth and transformation as women.”

I have never liked this statement. It was used often in conversations about church attendance and church growth initiatives. “Target the men and the women will come anyway.” I don’t like the idea of targeting either when it comes to the church, but that’s a different post for a different setting.

What really bothers me about this quote is that I am starting to believe it’s true from experience. The reality is that in our work at Enneagram Insight and all the many offerings we’ve put forward and coaching sessions I have done, the vast majority of attendees are women.

This fact has been true in our workshops but also in our Cadres and retreats. We’ve engaged 5 communities of people in our Cadres since 2020. In that time, we’ve had 50+ people participate; of that 50+, 9 were men. At our most recent Advent spiritual retreat, we had 15 participants; 0 men. (And I know you might say, “Well, David that was a Friday and men are working with end of quarter/year pressure.” I’ll note that day that we had numerous women who work full time who took PTO, including two entrepreneurial business owners and a couple of Moms who care for their children full time. Last I checked, those Moms don’t have any PTO to use but I do believe most if not all men have PTO at their jobs.)

The place we see men the most are Marriage Seminars, most of whom admit that their wife brought them. Even in my coaching practice, my flow of clients never exceeds 50% men, (though I am pleased that it is close to that most often).

Why is this trend the reality? Next week, I’ll share the biological reason women are more interested in spiritual growth and transformation. It’s real, in my perspective, and it raises the bar for the initiative it will take for men to pursue spiritual growth and transformation.

But for now, I’ll leave it to you to consider: men reading this, what shows in your life that you are actively pursuing spiritual growth and transformation?